Changing your Facebook Status from “Single” to “In a Relationship”!—Moving toward Commitment

Contributed by Thomas B. Holman and Abby Viveiros As couples begin to feel this comfortable, at ease, secure feeling in each other’s company, they are ready to move from “having dates” to “dating,” or being “in a relationship,” or having a “boyfriend” or “girlfriend.” We found all these terms to be used pretty much interchangeably by our research participants. With some couples this has to come after a pre-determined number of dates—like by the 3rd date. But with many couples it comes mor...
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Changing your Facebook Status from “Single” to “In a Relationship”!—Building Up a Relationship

  Contributed by Thomas B. Holman and Abby Viveiros So just listen—really listen Responding to Disclosures. Now let’s look at how you should respond when your date has given you some information or disclosed her or his feeling or opinion about something. Researchers have found that for you to be seen as responsive and caring, four things need to happen. You need to: Listen to what was said. Understand the “spoken” meaning of what was said and the more subtle “unspoke...
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Dozens of Great Date Ideas

From LDSdates.com Here is a whole truckload of ideas for dates.  Page through and find things that you might really enjoy. Crafts Antique hunting Candle making Collecting things Cross-stitching Drawing Flower arrangements Macramé Make t-shirts Painting Pottery Quilting Refinishing things Scrap-booking Sculpture   Cultural Concerts, free community concerts International culture dinner Learn new ethnic dances Local tours ...
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Changing your Facebook Status from “Single” to “In a Relationship”!—Attraction and Getting Acquainted

Contributed by Thomas B. Holman and Abby Viveiros Although the risk may be seen as high, especially at this very early phase, research shows that the most effective strategy [for getting better acquainted] is asking if a person would go out with you. The ABCs of Dating Getting from single to married is a unique adventure for everyone. But every relationship has a beginning, middle, and an end (ending in marriage or break up). One way to think about it is through the ABC’s: Attrac...
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Developing Your Pool of Eligibles – Absence Does NOT Make the Heart Grow Fonder

Contributed by Thomas B. Holman and Abby Viveiros Propinqu-what? What do you think research shows is the best predictor of whom you will marry? You’ll never guess. It is propinquity. Propinquity is sociologists’ fancy way of saying “proximity.” The best predictor of whom we marry is how close they are to us geographically. The more propinquitous we are to people, the more likely we are to marry one of them. This explains why actors marry their costars and parents want you to live arou...
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Marriage Preparation – Who Should Be IN Your Pool of Eligibles?

Contributed by Thomas B. Holman and Abby Viveiros In the last article, we learned about your “pool of eligibles”—people who are “eligible” for you to marry—and whom you should quickly eliminate from that pool. In this article we will discuss who should be IN your pool of eligibles. Two clichés about love are that “opposites attract” or “birds of a feather flock together.” Which is correct? Which is best for long-term survival of the marriage? Researchers have shown that we tend to m...
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