Dealing With Depression In Marriage  

With an estimated 17 million Americans suffering from a depressive illness, it is safe to say that mental illness is one of the most painful and persistent trials that a family will face. The American Medical Association considers it the most incapacitating of chronic conditions in relation to social functioning. More than one in ten people will suffer a serious depression at some point in their life; however nearly two-thirds do not get the help they need. Such an illness impacts the hom...
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Everyday Marriage

It was a beautiful spring morning as Todd leaned over to wake his wife with a soft kiss. "Good morning sweetheart." A smile formed on Sarah's tired face. She crawled out of bed and into the shower, as Todd began making eggs and toast. Just as Sarah came down the stairs, she heard Todd yell, "The school bus is here!" The kids rushed past Sarah and out the door. Sarah entered the kitchen to find Todd wolfing down breakfast. "I'll be late," he said. He reached over to touch her arm -- ...
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Solving Your “Solvable Problems”

According to John Gottman, marital conflicts fall into just two categories: solvable and perpetual. Perpetual conflicts show up over and over. They probably will never disappear because they come from fundamental differences in personality: She wants to have a baby but he doesn't want children; he hates clutter but she's a pack-rat; she wants a religious home but he's an atheist. Every marriage has conflicts like these. As one psychologist said, when you choose a life partner "you will in...
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Moving from Gridlock to Dialogue

Do you feel hopelessly stuck over a problem you and your spouse just can't solve? If so, learning to cope with the conflict may seem impossible, and you might fear your relationship is doomed. But don't despair. Many couples learn to deal with their gridlocked problems and build happy, successful relationships. A key to dealing with a gridlocked problem is to remember you don't have to solve the problem. It might never go away completely. Your goal, according to John Gottman, is to move "...
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Cognitive versus Spiritual Therapy

Anonymous In my life I have recognized my own mental dysfunctions and have sought various therapies, both academic and spiritual, to help me overcome them. In this article, I look at both approaches. Academic Research As I reviewed academic research, two cognitive therapies really resonated. The first was from M.E.P. Seligman, Learned Optimism. Summarized, outlook is important because pessimists tend to be less happy, productive, successful and healthy than optimists. The optimistic ...
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Effective Parenting

These two episodes from Real Families Real Answers (TM) explore the process of raising children, both when they're young and when they're teens. Effective Parenting This episode introduces us to the Rowes (at Hill Air Force Base) and the Howards of St. Anthony, Idaho.  The Rowes have 4 children and the Howards 10.  Of course, the Rowes are a military family, which is intrinsically interesting, while the Howards help their 10 children learn through the means of a family raspberry patch.  Bo...
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